Friday, February 22, 2013

God's grace is not in the "what if's..."

Cancer is not all it's cracked up to be.
And I mean that in the opposite way most of you might take it. What I mean is that despite the scariness and pain that cancer causes, God's grace is sufficient throughout the whole journey, so that the day to day walking through it is bearable. The "what if's" are NOT bearable.


I have been using the phrase "God's grace is sufficient" a lot lately. It has never meant as much as it does right now. The phrase comes from a letter that the apostle Paul wrote where he talked about "a thorn" that he had in his life that he had begged God to remove. He says: "But he [God] said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." (2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV)

Now I will tell you how I have seen evidence of this.

During this struggle I have not had the energy to make food for our family of six. Other people have brought us food. On nights when no one has brought us anything, somehow we still have dinner on the table. As a mother, it is easy for me to fret about nourishment for my kids, but I can tell you that there has not been one. single. night. when we have not been fed ABUNDANTLY.
God's grace is sufficient.

Six weeks ago I found out I had 12 more treatments to undergo. I didn't think I could do it. I thought it would kill me. Now I am halfway through. I'm doing it. It's not so bad. We still laugh and smile and have good times.
God's grace is sufficient.

Recently I read online about how people should be eating a certain way and exercising in order to kill cancer cells that pop up in the body. I really fretted and worked myself up about that. Not because I don't think we should eat healthy and exercise - I do - but because I CAN'T DO IT PERFECTLY. AT ALL. I was near to a panic attack because I just felt like cancer would keep coming back and back and back to my body. When I woke up the next morning, I opened my Bible app and a verse popped up on the screen: "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
God's grace is sufficient.

His grace is not in the "what if's." His grace is for me right now.
Thank you, Lord.

7 comments:

The Young Family said...

Your words are always such encouragement to me. God is using you in so many amazing ways. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Stay strong...we are praying for you daily!

Briana said...

powerful words, Amanda. Thank you for sharing where you are right now, in this moment....halfway through your 12 treatments. You are being courageous, and it impacts those around you in significant ways!

Amanda Conley said...

Thank you, Brianna. Your comments always encourage me. And thank you, Neel, for your prayers!

Makeminemidcentury said...

What a beautifully written post. I truly agree with everything you've written. God will see you and your family through this.

Melanie McGaughey said...

Girl, I just wrote that not along in HUGE letters on my office wall. It is enough. For everything I do not have and for everything I think I have to offer. It is enough. Thank you for sharing your heart. You are an encouragement and seeing how God has provided is an encouragement!!!! Hugs!!!

Tracy Ziemer said...

I've been humbled and overwhelmed as well by how blessed I've been in the midst of my own journey in ways that I wouldn't have experienced otherwise. God's grace is sweet. His merciful redemption of our struggles leaves us with hope that would be such bitter despair otherwise. I'm encouraged by your honesty and so relate to the dichotomy you describe. The choice to trust in the Lord is a daily one. I pray that He'll undergird your heart with strength to make that choice each time it crosses the tempting path of fear. Bless you.

Genesis A said...

thank you, thats all that can be said to such encouraging words. be Strong and God bless you.