Thursday, October 11, 2012

The PET scan

He trains my hands for war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
For you equipped me with strength for the battle; You made those who rise up against me sink under me.



The results of my PET scan are in. From what I gather, the places that breast cancer spreads to first are the axillary lymph nodes (the ones in your arm pit), the lungs, bones, blood, liver and brain.

The good news is that my lungs, bones, blood, liver and brain are clear.

Unfortunately, my right axillary lymph nodes lit up on the scan.
This most likely means that a lumpectomy will not be a good option, but we will do a full mastectomy and also remove the lymph nodes.
The lymph nodes in my left groin area as well as some areas in my abdomen were also lit up on the scan. This does not necessarily mean that those areas are cancer. Some of the areas may be lit up with something they are calling "physiological lighting," and they are telling me that that can be considered normal. What it means for the lymph nodes, is that they could be inflamed from an infection, or cancer. We will probably do a biopsy to determine the cause. My first oncologist appointment is tomorrow afternoon.

That is the medical lowdown.

As far as my mental and emotional status, today I am doing ok. I keep hearing about how strong a woman I am, but I am here to tell you that I am weak. So, so weak. There are moments when I am completely paralyzed by fear. My bowels are acting crazy, my heart is palpitating  and I have periods of shortness of breath.
Any strength that you are perceiving from me comes straight from the Lord Jesus Christ who is my shelter and my rock. When I am weak, He is strong.

Yesterday, before I received any news, this verse from the Bible leaped out at me and I wrote it on an index card that I can carry with me:

"The Lord is my strength and my defense; He has become my salvation...the Lord's right hand is lifted high; the Lord's right hand has done mighty things! I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done!"

15 comments:

Kellie said...

When I read this it brought tears to my eyes. But in my heart I know that you are going to be o.k. This side of your family are praying hard for you. Love, Kellie

Amanda Conley said...

Kellie, thank you so much. That means so much.

Briana said...

thanks for the update, Amanda. I can only imagine that you would have moments of weakness and fear. Your honesty and vulnerability ushers us all into the presence of a LIVING God who meets us right where we are. Thank you. Praying for you!!!

Amber Beckham Photography said...

I'm so glad to hear that it is not spread to the other areas...I love you girl and I'm praying!!

Shilo Cooper said...

Love you girl. Praying for you and your family. <3

A said...

Oh Amanda. I wish I could say something to make it easier. I wish you all the strength you need and a speedy recovery. I think you are an amazing woman.

Amanda Conley said...

Thank you, friends. Your comments boost my spirits.

Amanda Conley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LisaS said...

Praying for you. May God wrap His strength and comfort around you and your family and shield you from all else.

Joshua Pappas said...

I pray Jesus will bring to pass the exact words of that passage for you Amanda. Praying for you and your family!

Tracy said...

You are beautiful, Amanda, inside and out. Already God is using you in this to proclaim His GLORY! What an incredible example you are to your children.....you are clothed with strength and dignity, you can laugh at the days to come!
Love,
Tracy

Anonymous said...

Amanda- I was stopped in my tracks by your news. I said to Chad "We just saw her the other day!!". Shock and dismay are the best words to describe my reaction but even within all that there is a peace...not panic. I am believing for miraculous healing over your entire body! Cancer or not! I believe in an everlasting God...the creater of the universe and the same God who knows exactly how many beautiful curly hairs are on your head. He us the ultimate physitian! There are soooo many prayers going up for your healing and each so incredibly powerful. You are loved and treasured.:)
-Tabby C.

Amanda Conley said...

Friends, I want each of you to know that I have read and treasured each one of your comments and encouragements to me. Thank you for boosting my spirit and praying for me.

Ariana said...

I don't know where I have been. I have been a slacker blog reader and now I see this news. I know we are not IRL friends, but living in the same hood and having shared some similar past griefs has been a connection. Your news has sent me for a loop. I have another friend in the throes of this as well and I just can't do anything but drop to my knees for her and for you. Praise God for all He has done and all He will continue to do! I am joining you in speaking His word over you.

Amanda Conley said...

Thank you, Ariana.